If you missed last night’s live, don’t worry—I’ve got you. We had a deep, heart-centered conversation about something many of us struggle with silently: the way we speak to ourselves.
Our topic was “The Way You Speak to Yourself Can Make or Break You,” and whew—this one hit home. I’m not just talking about the big affirmations we say in the mirror. I mean those quiet, private conversations you have with yourself when no one’s around. The words you whisper in moments of stress, failure, or doubt.
Because those words? They shape everything. Your growth. Your healing. Your peace. Your overall wellness.
So, where Does Our Inner Voice Come From?
We didn’t just magically develop negative self-talk—it was taught, modeled, and internalized over time.
Here’s where it often comes from:
• The way people spoke to us growing up
• The way we saw people speak to themselves
• How we saw people being spoken to—especially when they messed up or were vulnerable
If you were criticized, ignored, or constantly “corrected” growing up, that tone becomes your norm. But the good news is: you can unlearn it. You can retrain your inner voice to sound like compassion instead of criticism.
The Power of Life & Death Is in the Tongue (Proverbs 18:21)
This scripture reminds us: our words carry weight.
Every time you say,
• “I’m lazy.”
• “I’ll never get this right.”
• “I’m not good enough.”
You’re speaking death over your potential. You’re reinforcing shame.
But when you shift and say:
• “I’m learning.”
• “I’m growing.”
• “I deserve to rest and reset.”
You’re speaking life. And life heals.
How Your Words Affect Your Wellness
Your nervous system hears how you speak to yourself. Words create physical and emotional responses.
Negative self-talk can:
• Increase stress and anxiety
• Lower motivation and confidence
• Lead to feelings of shame
• Make healing feel impossible
Positive self-talk can:
• Soothe your nervous system
• Increase clarity and confidence
• Cultivate a sense of self-worth
• Fuel your wellness journey
The goal is to do better right? So, here are some tools to shift into empowering self-talk…
To change the inner conversation:
1. First, be aware
Start noticing what you say to yourself—especially during hard moments.
I challenge you to write it down. Ask yourself, would I say this to someone I love? If not, it doesn’t belong in your head.
2. Speak life, DAILY
Say 3 affirmations every morning that meet you where you are.
For example:
• I am enough.
• I am growing.
• I am learning to love myself out loud.
3. Give yourself the grace that you give others
You forgive, encourage, and hype up everyone else—do the same for YOU.
4. Surround yourself with life-giving language AND life-speaking people
Curate your circle. Unfollow negative voices. Feed your spirit with books, podcasts, and people who speak life.
So, let’s practice…
What’s one negative thing you’ve caught yourself saying lately?
Write it down or drop it in the comments—and then rewrite it.
Then FLIP it…
What’s one new affirmation you’re going to start speaking over yourself this week?
I want you to shower yourself with and surround yourself with people who will encourage you to love on yourself. Life got so much better when I started focusing on love, growth, and support—exactly what we all deserve.
Final Reminder:
You are worthy of grace, softness, and support—especially from yourself. Be your own safe space. Be your own hype woman. Be your own healer.